Submitting to God's will

I know that God has a plan for my life, that He is the best Person to make plans for my life. But so often I struggle with letting go of my own plans and allowing Him to be completely in charge. I truly believed that He had called me to the states. But during missions conference, He challenged the plans I had made based on that belief. They weren't anything substantial yet, nothing set in stone, but they were safe. They were close to home. They were in my culture. Dr. Wilt, our teacher for Prayer, told me about an older missionary who is in a different country and he said they were looking for someone to take over for her when she retired. Almost immediately, I shot that idea down in my head. I told him that I believed that the Lord had called me to the states. He said that his missions board could work with me here too, and the topic dropped. But the thought stuck in my head. I shot it down each time and each time it returned. So, I decided to wrestle with it. I know that God can handle my emotions and that He wants me to tell Him what I'm thinking. I told Him that I didn't want to go to Venezuela. I told Him that I wanted to stay in the states, that I thought that was where He wanted me too. But then I told Him I was willing to have my mind changed. I was willing for Him to change my plans, though it would be hard. Nothing is for sure except God and His love. I can trust in Him and His sovereignty. And He has been changing my mind. If it is His will, then I will go to Venezuela. I will serve the Deaf community wherever He wants me to. I will not put plans in stone, because they could be changed at a moment's notice. I know that sometimes God calls you to one place because you aren't ready for the 'real' place. If He had told me three years ago that I was going to Venezuela, I would have run. But now, I am open to where He wants me to go. And whether I go to another country or not isn't something I need to be concerned about right now. My mission field will be RIT, and that is more immediate, therefore more important to be thinking about. But even more importantly than, I need to be focusing on the Planner, not the plan. It will change, but He never will.